The Wedding Expert
Tagline
Love is a many splendored thing.
The heart wants what the heart wants.
The one thing CJ knows about pansexuality is that she has no idea which gender to marry.
Logline
CJ is an expert on everybody’s wedding…except her own.
Short Synopsis
CJ Taylor, a 30’s career gal has built an impressive resume as a bi-coastal wedding expert. When she falls for Bobby Jean, a bombshell actress, CJ explores pansexuality as she plans their whirlwind wedding. Homesick and longing for an arts and crafts wedding in her small Oklahoma town, matters complicate for CJ when she is confronted by her college sweetheart, Budget Barnett. CJ swirls in the eye of the tornado she has created.
Brief Synopsis
CJ TAYLOR’S wedding expert business has expanded from New York City to Malibu in its sixth year. A charming graduate of small-town Oklahoma, CJ is homesick for uncomplicated lifestyle, genuine humility and unlimited creative vision of glitter and rhinestones. Life has become complex for CJ as she explores her own lonely sexuality. When she rescues bombshell actress BOBBY JEAN from a ruinous marriage, CJ finds herself hopelessly smitten. Our story begins two weeks later, when homesick CJ plans her impulsive whirlwind wedding.
CJ is met with love and acceptance from her parents, SANDY and CHRISTOPHER. Preparations are in motion for an over the top teal/dove inspired ceremony at the local wedding chapel. CJ is thrilled to reconnect with townspeople including her best childhood friend, LORNA DOON. CJ is set back on her heels when, to her surprise, this return home collides with her ex-boyfriend, BUDGET BARNETT. On the flipside, CJ must also confront JUNIOR, the town bully, who represents everything awful about narrow-minded homophobes.
Cue the wedding party, arriving in full fanfare: JEFF, a gorgeous 30’s wedding consultant, a heterosexual cross-dresser who loves fashion in every form. KIM, CJ’s business partner and friend arrives late in the game just as the entire wedding fray unravels. As much as CJ loves her gauche teal, gold and dove inspired wedding motif, just that much more horrified is her would-be socialite fiancé, Bobby Jean. Personalities collide as the wedding romp unfolds, with CJ spinning in the eye of the tornado she has created.
Short Page Number – Plot Point Summary Page
Opening Montage of Oklahoma, OU Football, Sooner State,
CJ’s college graduation, etc. 1
—
Monday – CJ talks with her parents about wedding plans. 1
CJ will be home tomorrow. Wedding is Saturday. 2
CJ’s fiancé is Bobby (parents assume a man) 4
We meet Bobby, 30’s bombshell and plan for a rush wedding sealed 5
Tuesday- Mom Sandy decorates wedding chapel with Tom/
Camera filming the entire event 5
We meet Lorna Doon, 30’s CJ’s childhood friend 6
Theme Stated -Love is a Many Splendored Thing 6
CJ arrives 8
Budget Barnett, 30’s CJ’s former boyfriend unexpectedly arrives 9
Wednesday – CJ’s parents, Chris and Sandy interviewed 12
CJ and Lorna lip sync 14
Best Friend Jeff, 30’s arrives 14
Thursday – Bobby Arrives and is horrified 17
Bud is interviewed 19
Bobby’s monologue to Tom 24
Bobby meets Bud for the first time and feathers ruffle 31
Jeff enters in his royal blue Vegas dress 33
Friday Preparing for Bridal Shower, new teal dress arrives for Jeff 34
Jeff’s interview 35
Flashback to CJ in her Malibu office talking to Jeff’s father Jefferson 37
The bridal shower is underway and drag queen Contessa calls
Contessa, on face time, mentions a potential role for Bobby on the
new freeality tv show Ex-Wives Of Fresno. 40
Bobby tries on her wedding dress while Jeff takes CJ out to
Talk to Bud 43
CJ conducts an “expert” phone call with client 45
CJ confronts town bully, Junior 46
A friendly conversation with Bud turns hostile 47
CJ returns to the shower and sees Bobby in her drop-dead gorgeous
Wedding dress. CJ’s heart skips a beat 50
A face time call from Cousin Jill results in an argument
Between CJ and Bobby about babies 51
As Bobby changes clothes, she and CJ argue, and Bobby storms out 56
Jeff enters to try on the new teal dress 56
Jeff’s father, Jefferson enters unexpectedly and shocks both CJ
And Jeff by offering his son an heirloom strand of pearls 57
Lorna, outside the bride’s room door, is insulted by Junior 62
Lorna and Jeff establish a loving bond as he consoles her 62
The wedding rehearsal commences and is a disaster. 64
If things aren’t bad enough, a rubber chicken is thrown onto the
Altar stage. 64
Saturday – Morning. On the interview couch hot seat, Junior is confronted
for throwing the chicken 64
CJ arrives and forgives Junior 65
Kim, CJ’s spirited partner, arrives and sandwiches Junior on the couch 66
Kim and CJ catch up and decide to take Junior for a wedding makeover 68
Bobby and CJ discuss preparations for the wedding day and Bobby again
Insults CJ’s town. CJ offers a lame ultimatum 71
When CJ arrives at the little park, Lorna and Jeff are having a lively
Conversation. Clearly, they have bonded 71
A SONG covers the montage of people getting ready for the wedding 71
The song continues as CJ sits on the playground swing. She remembers
Her memorable days spent in this little neighborhood park 73
CJ’s daydream and song fade as Chris arrives to have a
Father/daughter chat. 74
Bud arrives with coffee and a donut and Chris leaves 76
Bud declares his love for CJ, and they embrace 78
Bobby enters, sees them, screams, and stomps off 78
The Song continues as
Bud leaves, and a stunned CJ walks across the little park to the front
Door of the chapel. CJ pauses, listens to the sound of Bobby
Leaving
Bud, standing at the edge of the park, watches and wonders CJ considers her options, opens the door of the chapel and Goes in. 80
The Song ends.
Inside the chapel, CJ has brief words with Kim 80
CJ enters the bride’s room and sees Jeff and Lorna in an intimate
Conversation. Distracted, CJ doesn’t even notice them. 81
CJ has a bit of a meltdown with her parents that shows her utter
Bafflement 83
CJ storms out of the chapel 83
Scene fades to the afternoon of the wedding. It is now 4:45, and
Guests, including Jefferson and the flamboyant Clarissa enter 84
The ceremony starts.
The flower girls enter and throw flower petals dramatically into the
Audience.
Bud enters and escorts Sandy to the second pew
Bud stands at the altar.
Kim and Junior enter. Junior looks fantastic and Kim looks darling
Next, Chris escorts CJ down the aisle in CJ’s wedding attire.
To everyone’s surprise, CJ takes her place to the side of the altar
Next to bridesmaid Kim.
The fanfare changes to a dramatic hip hop version of
A wedding march as Lorna and Jeff enter as a couple.
Lorna wears the white dress of her dreams, and Jeff wears the
Beaded teal dress.
The audience is stunned for a moment.
Then, the audience, who has come to a new way of seeing the
World and everyone in it, cheers for Lorna and Jeff.
CJ announces that there will be a reception after the ceremony and
A football challenge the next morning.
She takes off her jacket and shows the red Sooners tee.
She turns around QB1 is on the back. 87
Sunday All are assembled at the little park for a makeshift football
Game ala Oklahoma University rivalry games
White team, quarterbacked by Bud gathers at the center of the park
Red team, quarterbacked by Jeff gathers across from white team.
CJ stands on the sidelines with Sandy and Tom, filming the game.
CJ restates theme love is a many splendored thing. 88
After a few plays, Grandma catches the football in the makeshift
End zone, and everyone cheers as Fade 89
Credits – Character Cameo’s
Set of Ex-Wives of Fresno – Contessa consoles the newly fashioned ex-wife Bobby
In reality tv style. Bobby attacks the woman/camera. 91
The End
Treatment
The Wedding Expert
By Debi Hall
TREATMENT
DAY 1 MONDAY:
CHRISTANDRA JANE TAYLOR (CJ), 32, is a pixie spitfire who has defined a successful career as a wedding expert, with offices in NYC and Malibu. When CJ decides to marry Malibu beauty and aspiring actress BOBBY JEAN HARPER, 31, she decides that the wedding must take place in her small Oklahoma hometown at the local wedding chapel. Fearing the disapproval of her parents, CJ has kept the wedding details a secret. Although the whole town knows that CJ has always been the girl next door who loves everyone, nobody is aware of CJ’s exploration of a lesbian/bi-sexual…heaven only knows…lifestyle.
It is morning, and CJ opens the film by reminding (via iPad) her mother SANDY and her father CHRIS that she will be returning to Oklahoma (the Sooner State) tomorrow and that the wedding will take place on Saturday. CJ tells her parents that she has known Bobby, whom they presume to be a man, for two weeks. That call, it turns out, was easy. Convincing Bobby that the next step in their two-week whirlwind romance is an Oklahoma wedding is going to cost CJ…plenty.
DAY 2 – TUESDAY:
Now in the Oklahoma Wedding Chapel, CJ calls to let her mother know she is on the way. POV changes for the duration to Tom/Camera, CJ’s friend, who will be filming the entire wedding event documentary style. Sandy and Chris join CJ’s best friend, Lorna and a few townspeople to begin organizing the elaborate teal and dove themed decorations. Tom/Camera is with them, filming everything.
Tom/Camera interviews LORNA DOON, CJ’s best childhood friend, and asks about her romantic aspirations. Lorna explains that she has never been able to put an actual face on the word love and finds the whole idea of romance confusing. Love is a many splendored thing, Lorna explains.
CJ arrives and is thrilled with Sandy’s gaud-awful teal decorations. Delighted to see Lorna, CJ is surprised by the arrival of BUDGET BARNETT 30’s, her former boyfriend, newly moved back to town and now helping repair the chapel altar. CJ’s heart flutters.
DAY 3: WEDNESDAY
The action now returns to Tom’s interviews. Sandy and Chris reminisce about CJ and how excited they are to meet, what they expect to be, their new son-in-law, Bobby. Chris misses his daughter who was cheerleader, tomboy, babysitter and athlete all in one little person. He says he always called her QB1 when she played football with the neighborhood boys.
CJ and Lorna are having a blast at the church altar, remembering their childhood days as “flower girls for hire.” How many weddings did they plan in this chapel? When Sandy enters with flowers, the girls reenact their lip sync routine to SONG
During the darling lip sync, CJ’s Best Man, JEFF, 32, a handsome African American, heterosexual cross-dresser arrives. He enters the chapel in a tailored men’s suit. Unaware of his proclivity for women’s clothes, Lorna’s jaw drops when she sees this gorgeous man. Jeff winks at Lorna and introduces himself to Sandy.
DAY 4 – THURSDAY
CJ finishes a business call just as Bobby arrives in grand fanfare. Bobby takes in the spectacle that is this sequin décor and hurls a horror film scream.
CJ consoles Bobby and they embrace as Chris enters with Bobby’s suitcases. Uncomfortable, Chris leaves. CJ mentions Bud. Who’s Bud? Bobby asks.
Tom/Camera interviews Bud, who inadvertently shows his shock and disappointment in CJ’s love choice.
In the Bride’s Room, Sandy is introduced to Bobby by her daughter. To CJ’s surprise, the identity of the bombshell comes as no surprise to her mother. In a flashback, we learn that Lorna spilled the beans during her Tuesday interview.
When Sandy leaves the bride’s room, CJ and Bobby discuss aspects of their upcoming marriage. They’ve only known each other for 2 weeks, so these courtship conversations are happening two days before the wedding.
CJ leaves after the conversation takes an odd twist, and Bobby spills her heart out to Tom/Camera, explaining her life.
Back at the altar, CJ and Sandy argue about wedding music as Bobby, fresh from her meltdown, arrives to help. It is during this exchange that Bobby, for the first time, meets Bud. CJ helplessly stands in this middle of the tornado she created.
The tension is broken when Sandy announces that Jeff wants everyone to see his otfit for the wedding. Stunned townspeople adjust themselves to normal smiles when Jeff, decked out from head to toe in a royal blue Las Vegas showgirl dress and headpiece.
Bud is totally confused. Lorna is absolutely thrilled.
DAY 5 FRIDAY
On Friday morning, in the Bride’s Room, decorations are in process for the Bridal Shower, set to take place at 1, just before the wedding rehearsal. Dotty brings in a new beaded teal dress for Jeff to wear to the wedding. Sandy and CJ approve.
Tom/Camera interviews Jeff, who describes his life as a wedding designer. With Lorna eavesdropping, Jeff opens up to Tom about his love of all fashion. When Tom asks Jeff if his father will be coming to the wedding, Jeff explains their estrangement.
In Flash Back, we return to the Monday conversation between CJ and her parents. After her conversation with Bobby, it turns out, CJ called Jeff’s father JEFFERSON, and invited him to the Friday shower and Saturday wedding.
Returning to the Bride’s Room CJ’s, bridal shower is filled with laughter and excitement. Bobby sits absent mindedly on the sofa. CJ opens small town gifts. Bobby is horrified by these gifts.
During the shower, CJ has arranged for a face time call from prominent New York socialite drag queen Contessa. CJ has asked Contessa to meet Bobby via ipad to discuss a possible new tv venture. Contessa explains that she is planning a new tv show – not exactly reality but based alternative facts. The “freeality” show will be called The Ex-Wives of Fresno. There might be a place for Bobby. To Bobby, the notion of freeality tv quickly translates to fame and a day-time Emmy. Since CJ just wanted to offer some hope, Bobby’s over- reaction is silly.
Jeff enters and breaks the tension by suggesting the Bobby try on her wedding dress. Dotty is there and can mark any needed alterations. All agree and Jeff suggests that CJ come with him to the parking lot to see Bud’s signage handy work.
Bud sits on the boxes in his pickup flatbed and shows CJ the wedding sign he created. Bud surprises CJ by opening one of the boxes and handing her a red tee shirt. CJ and Bud continue with a conversation that quickly turns into an argument.
A frustrated CJ returns to the Bride’s Room and the shower in progress to see Bobby, standing in front of the 3 way mirror. CJ gulps when she sees this gorgeous, sexy woman.
Cousin Jill calls in on face time and deals with her 3 children, who want her attention. This call inspires a tense conversation about children. CJ is beginning to realize that a 2 week courtship allows little time for important conversations. Uncomfortable guests are escorted out by Sandy.
When Bobby leaves in frustration, Jeff enters. CJ and Dotty decide to have Jeff try on the new teal dress. He does so and looks stunning. To Jeff’s horror, his father, Jefferson, stands in the doorway. With nowhere to hide, Jeff welcomes his father. Jefferson shocks everyone by offering Jeff the generous gift of an heirloom strand of pearls.
While Jeff changes clothes, CJ leaves with Dotty to see about her own dress. Outside the door, CJ brushes past Lorna, who reminds her of the rehearsal.
During these entrances and exits to the Bride’s Room, we meet JUNIOR, the town bully who represents all that is wrong with narrow-minded homophobic people. In this exchange, he insults Lorna.
Lorna enters the Bride’s Room in tears, and Jeff consoles her. It is clear that the two are becoming close. Lorna embraces Jeff’s style and flair, and Jeff is taken by Lorna’s simple charm.
The rehearsal begins, announced by the ever-present over-the-top organist, MOTHER MURPHY. Everything that can go wrong does, and a catastrophe of dove feathers, sequins, glitter and decorations conclude when “someone” drops a rubber chicken from the catwalks above onto the altar stage.
DAY 6 SATURDAY:
Wedding day begins with a morning interview of Junior, who sits uncomfortably in the hot seat as Tom quizzes him about the rubber chicken incident. Junior confesses. To Junior’s surprise, CJ slips onto the sofa and forgives him. She knows there’s a decent person in there somewhere. KIM, CJ’s spirited partner, arrives. She’s a little late but assures CJ that the business is running smoothly. Kim and CJ decide to give Junior a makeover since he is now invited to the wedding.
CJ surveys the wedding chapel. Townspeople have been up all night restoring the decorations. Bobby enters, furious…as usual…about her hair. CJ sets a lame ultimatum when Bobby’s insults about her town and its citizens is too much.
CJ is now disappointed by her lack of conviction and confused about her own identity. As a SONG plays, she strolls to the park where she finds Jeff and Lorna having a delightful conversation. They leave and CJ sits on the park swing, remembering a childhood that was free of heartbreak. As she daydreams, CJ remembers her QB1 days playing football with the boys and is brought back to the present by Chris, who joins her for a father/daughter chat.
Bud enters with coffee and a special donut and declares his love for CJ. They resolve their conflicts and CJ hugs Bud. Bobby arrives just in time to see the embrace, horror film screams and leaves. Bud leaves as well, and CJ is faced with a dilemma: follow Bobby, pursue a renewed relationship with Bud or…hell who knows.
The song continues as CJ crosses the park, looks back at Bud, listens to Bobby’s screeching exit tires and makes a decision. She enters the chapel. A few moments later she sees her happily married parents, has a bit of a meltdown and storms out.
The song and day change to a quiet wedding melody as dusk brings the wedding guests, including Jefferson and a grand entrance by Contessa. When the wedding starts, the flower girls enter with carnation petals. Next to enter is Bud. In his tuxedo, Bud escorts Sandy to the second pew. Next in line is Kim with a newly decked out Junior, complete with Hollywood hair cut.
The audience smiles when CJ enters with Chris. They are surprised when CJ takes her place next to Kim as a bridesmaid.
The music changes to a hip hop march as Lorna, wearing the white bride’s dress of her dreams, enters with Jeff, resplendent in the teal beaded dress. It is they who are to be married.
A hesitation in the audience as they adjust to this development and then roaring applause. As the ceremony fades to an end while townspeople tear up, CJ takes the stage and invites everyone to a Sunday football scrimmage in the park. CJ removes her wedding jacket to reveal a red Sooner’s tee shirt. On the back is QB1.
SUNDAY
The wedding scene fades to the makeshift football game at the park. While town folk wear red or white tee shirts, handed to them from the boxes in Bud’s truck, Tom/Camera in the style of a post-game football interview, pans to the sidelines to take a moment to interview CJ, who stands next to her mother.
CJ restates the theme: love is a many splendored thing. She gives her mother a big hug and a kiss.
Tom/Camera widens the shot to show us Grandma, who uses her walker as a blocker, runs to the “end zone” scores a touchdown. A young child pulls a cart in a semi-circle around the goal, ala the Sooner Schooner moment shown at the top. The scene fades with CJ celebrating the touchdown and folks laughing and celebrating in the “end zone.”
The End
Cameo Credits
Interior of the Ex-Wives of Fresno set. Tom marks the scene. Contessa, sitting on a sofa next to Bobby, consoles the newest ex-wife. Contessa reassures the bouffant blonde that the woman across from Bobby just called her a mild name. Words exchange and Bobby attacks the woman.
Cut.
Song Ideas